Fw: Dennis Miller goes off on the music biz........

["John Lettiere" <lettiere>]

Subject: FW: Dennis Miller goes off on the music biz........


> The other night on Dennis Miller's HBO show he went off on the music
> industry.
> Here is what he said:
>
> "Did you guys see the Grammys the other night?  Christ, there are more
> subcategories than Larry Flynt's home video library.  I think somebody
> actually won for "Best Silence."
>
> Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but the music industry is in
> more trouble than a late-shift radar operator in Baghdad.
>
> Hey, lets put our cards on the obsolete turntable.  The Music Industry has
> nothing to do with music.  What you hear on the radio today is one-half
> marketing, one-half public relations and two-thirds timing.  And if that
> math makes sense to you, you probably work in the Royalties Department at
> any one
> of the major labels.
>
> Now, I watched the Grammy Awards on Wednesday, and all I kept thinking
was,
> "Hey, where's a rolling blackout when you really need one?"  I couldn't
help
> but
> be struck by the fact that, while our founding fathers guaranteed us all
the
> right to freedom of speech, they never said anything about singing, OK?  A
> lot of
> this stuff is just shit, and unwrapping the CD is often more complex than
> the
> thought that went into the music.
>
> I love music.  It gives you something to listen to while you're watching
> videos. And make no mistake, the music industry has turned itself into a
> visual
> medium and, that being the case, I feel I'm within my rights to
respectfully
> request that the members of Steely Dan never be allowed to appear on a
> prime-time
> telecast ever again.  For Christ's sake, for a second there, I thought I
was
> watching "The X-Files."  Is it just me, or do the two guys in Steely Dan
> look like Ben & Jerry coming out of rehab? The only reason Steely Dan's
> latest
> album is selling so well is that 50-year-olds don't know how to download
it
> for free.
>
> You know why Eminem showed up at the Grammy's?  Because it sells. Eminem
> isn't about freedom of speech as much as he is about the freedom to make a
> buck.
> He isn't peddling his songs underground to get his point across; he needs
> controversy to keep him famous because of his unfortunate dearth of
talent.
> He stops selling records, and no one gives a fuck about his freedom of
> speech
> anymore.  You think Gino Vanelli stopped making records because he gave up
> the right to his freedom of speech?
>
> You know what?  I like Eminem.  Not because he's funny, or because I like
> his music.  I just like what he has to say about women and gays ... Wait,
I
> don't mean that.  That's just an ironic character I'm playing, casting
light
> on
> our society's new wave of political correctness.
>
> Before you focus too much of your time and energy on loathing Eminem for
his
> music, let me spin this little scenario for you.  Marilyn Manson spent
> Wednesday night watching the Grammys on a 13-inch black-and-white
television
> set with a coat hanger for an antenna, at a Grange Hall in Bismark, North
> Dakota, after unveiling his apocalyptic vision for the future to fifty or
so
> pasty-faced
> Goth losers who left during the encore so they could get home and watch
> "Temptation Island."  And trust me, Manson was so depressed that he is no
> longer in the crosshairs of the hate-rock controversy, he could barely
> wriggle out of his
> fake vagina suit.
>
> People like Eminem get all the attention, but the music industry is still
> very much alive, pulsating with vibrant, unique, and indeed
> weltanschauung-shaping musicians.  Beck's "Midnite Vultures" offers a
fiery,
> eclectic mingling of genres that we've not witnessed since "Exile On
> Mainstreet."  Radiohead's "Kid A" has picked up Pink Floyd's torch to help
> illuminate the cringing fears of a lurching generation unable to shake
their
> parents post-Kerouacian haze.  'N Sync's silvery, almost symphonic
harmonies
> pick up where early Hanson left off, suggesting optimistic redemption with
> dulcet choruses that say you may not love me now, but I can try, try, try.
>
> Pop music has a rich legacy of ripping people off.  First, the white
> musicians stole from the blacks.  Then, the producers stole from the
> performers.
> Then, the performers and the producers formed an alliance to steal from us
> by charging 19 dollars for a CD with only one halfway decent song on it.
So
> I for one salute Napster, because it's high time the public finally had an
> opportunity to horn in on a piece of the action. Considering how badly you
> get fucked every time you go into a record store, I have to assume Richard
> Branson was trying to be
> ironic when he named the place Virgin.
>
> Now, industry people will tell you that Napster is unfair, and denies
> musicians of their rightful, hard-earned cash.  But musicians are going to
> waste their hard-earned cash anyway, OK?  They're musicians.  Napster will
> only be a
> serious problem for the industry when it starts cutting into a musician's
> anonymous backstage blowjob residuals.
>
> Hey, the bottom line on Napster is, it means no more paying for overpriced
> CD's and putting money into the pockets of the bloated, corrupt media
> conglomerates. All you need is a computer with a high-speed modem, extra
> memory, a CD-ROM attachment, an extra phone line, Internet access, a CD
> burner, blank CD's, a how-to manual, and NO FUCKING LIFE.
>
> You know what-- the music industry has always been about the coin.  If
> they'd been invented at the time, Mozart would've sold t-shirts in the
back
> of the
> hall. And Ticketmaestro would've skimmed their 20% off the top.
>
> While the sounds of U2 might be music to our ears, all the music industry
> hears is the soothing chime of the cash register.  But the one thing you
> have to
> say about the music business is, for the artists, if the product is great,
> it'll
> also be timeless.  All you have to do is look at the Billboard charts to
see
> that
> The Beatles are just as popular today as they were when Yoko broke them
up.
> Not
> that I dwell on that.  And Yoko, by the way, if you're out there listening
> tonight, why don't you level your karma and start dating one of the Baha
> Men, OK?
>
> Of course, that's just my opinion.  I could be wrong."
>
> -Dennis Miller
>


John Lettiere GM
Preferred Computing Inc.
http://perfcomp.homestead.com/Prefcomp.html

You Don't Need A Weatherman To Know Which Way The Wind Blows...Bob Dylan